Protest

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." - First amendment to the US Constitution

The first time, I ever remember being in a situation where an organized protest directly impacted me occurred when I was studying abroad in the UK. The teachers union was on strike for higher, more fair, wages and they picket-lined around the edges of the school, in front of our classrooms, and threatened not to grade our work, if they weren't granted their requests. To have my professors semi-blocking my way into the classroom was a new experience. Since then, I've been privy to that experience several other times (living in DC, working at UNC, living in Boston, etc).

Earlier this week, I found myself again in that situation. Protesters shouted their views, threw fliers in our faces, and pounded on windows, doors, and other objects. Their passion was admirable. Their perspective was certainly worth listening to. They certainly caught my attention with their strategy. But ultimately, their method was ineffective and counter-productive. It made me want to listen to them less.

In that moment, I was reminded of the "Jesus or going-to-hell-fire-and-damnation" street preachers that I dislike so much. While the two groups would never sit down and have tea and crumpets and light and frivolous conversation together, in that moment, they were surprisingly similar. They both sounded angry. They both yell. They get in your face. And ultimately, both of their success rates are relatively low.

What is it in us that turns us into creatures when we feel like our beliefs are being threatened or challenged? Or when we encounter someone of a different ideology that cannot co-exist with ours? Where does tolerance go then?

Shame on us, if we, supposedly one of the most tolerant societies in the world, have rendered a situation in which both the religious right and the secular left, both liberal evangelicals, and secular conservatives feel that they cannot, will not, be listened to as intellectuals and individuals, rationally presenting their cases.

Shame on us, if our understanding of truth is so weak that having someone else disagree with it, creates huge fear and anger. If something is true, it stands, regardless of how many people disown it or disagree with it. Defensiveness often times comes out of fear, not freedom in truth. Truth is bigger than disagreement. We should stand on that, not lash back.

Shame on us, if our tolerance has in fact weakened our ability to care for others well. Someone once said, "For all our tolerance and talk, we have lost our generosity and willingness to help. We do not minister, but we applaud. We have lost our ability to care and have compassion in order to have open tolerance for anything."

Shame on us, if our personal vendetta against a belief or lifestyle or choices has led us to lack enough compassion for the persuade them in a way that they can actually hear.

Shame on us.

Don't get me wrong; I think freedom of speech is great. And I think there are times for righteous anger, turning over the temple tables, so to speak. I think there have been plenty of times in our history in which protest has brought about good and holy change. I think it's a valuable tool in a democratic society. But at the same time, we have to think about our methods:

What is most effective? What is most persuasive? What actually cares for people well? What moves people in healthy directions? What creates good and holy social and personal change?

I don't pretend to have all the answers. I don't know what the most effective method is... I'm just offering a healthy rhetorical challenge to the status quo in this particular situation.

[gulp] Money.

It's the end of the month, which means that I have exactly $64.91 in my checking account, with $64.00 worth of bills to pay between now and April 30th.

So, today, I had had enough... I went to the grocery store and bought french fries, ketchup, frosting, cake, bananas, granola bars... you get the point. Food that is (mostly) neither healthy, nor actually needed. But I was so tired of having to budget dollar by dollar that I just felt the need to splurge. Put it on my credit card. Pretend it didn't exist.

And while it felt instantaneously satisfying, and yes, I will enjoy those french fries tonight... within minutes of leaving the grocery store, the guilt set in. Shame. I failed in terms of living within my budget for this month.

Now, friends, this is a pretty minor failure. I have the money in other accounts to cover it. I will get a paycheck at the end of the month. My splurge only totaled $16.56. I still only bought the generic brands. (I'm sure some of you are laughing at me now). In reality, I probably need to be a little bit more liberal with my money (I can be pretty penny-pinching). BUT, here's my point:

I think with regard to money, we all at one time or another fall into one of two camps:

We get frustrated by living within our means. We want to throw off responsibility. We hate having parameters or limitations to our financial capacity. If we want to put it in practical context, I think this is one of the reasons why our economy is in trouble these days. Many of us enjoy the freedom of living beyond our means: enter the dilemma of credit cards. Another unfortunate out-play of our "I want it now; I want it my way" culture.

I don't think this is what God meant when he said, "Honor the LORD with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce." (Proverbs 3:9)

Now, lest you think that you're off the hook if you don't overspend, or splurge, let me briefly address the other side. For others of us, we're actually too tight with our money. We hoard. We scrimp. We save. And we rarely share. We're great at living within our means. But we're terrible at generosity. And this is not honoring God with our money either.

So what does it look like to "Honor the Lord with your wealth"?

Let me take a brief stab at that, with some things that I've found helpful in the past few years:

1) Tithe. Just do it. We say that we don't have enough, but then somehow it magically appears when we want to go on a ski weekend or out to dinner, or your daily grand latte. Honor the Lord with your money. If you don't want to tithe to your church, then at least give to a missions organization that you support. Less 6% of households self-titled born-again "Christian" actually tithe (Barna research 2003).

2) Budget. Plan out ahead of time what expenses you have on a month-to-month or week-to-week basis. Put in some "fun" money. And it's OK to not always stick to the plan... but a plan helps set healthy, reasonable parameters, making it easier to be held accountable and to live within your means.

3) Give Generously. I make it a practice to give when I am asked, if I am at all able. Since I started this practice, my giving has nearly doubled, easily. But somehow there has always been enough. And it has forced me to think about how dearly I value money, and how tightly I cling to it. It's also forced me to give up some things that I would love to be able to do for myself, but have re-prioritized. And it has made me value, more than ever, the people who give sacrificially so I can do what I do. I am entirely supported by the generosity of others. I think it's very biblical for the response to generosity to be generosity.

4) Splurge Occasionally. It's okay. Ecclesiastes 5:19 tells us to enjoy what God has given, without guilt. It's okay to buy something you don't need occasionally. Live in the freedom that you have been given. Otherwise it will become a law unto itself and you will still be enslaved to money, not as one form of idol, but the opposite extreme.

5) Be satisfied to live within or below your means. We have this mentality which constantly wants more than what we actually have. When we first graduate from college, we make menial wages, yet we survive. Then we get promoted, and we make more money and somehow things are still tight. And part of this reality is that as we get promoted we get more stuff. We get bigger stuff. And we increase our living expenses and lifestyle. And it ends up being futile and very unsatisfying. Take my word for it: it is far more satisfying to live at or below your means and practice generosity than it is to constantly worry if you have enough to keep up with a lifestyle beyond your capacity. Striving is wearisome.

Okay. I'm going to go cook my french fries now (and enjoy the splurge!). But I'd love to hear your thoughts... :-)

...Is to Live.

jesus is risen.
he is risen indeed.
dare i to believe
resurrection power
also bestows he on me?
new life,
my darkness conquered,
my brokenness put to an end,
my dead flesh defeated, done in.
how then respond we?
it is for freedom that I
have set you free.
free to live, move, breathe.
free to leap, jump, fly, run.
free to embrace, love, forgive.
freed to be a child again.
it is for freedom that I
have set you free.
free at last.
now go, therefor(th)e and live.
filled with My life:
full...
abundant...
joyful...
free...
loved (unto death).
redeemed (fully in all things).
delighted in.
rejoiced over.
the full embrace of the
good Father
awaits, yea runs, with open arms:
come forth, daughter.

Galatians 2:20, 5:1

Betrayal

Luke 22: 17- 21 And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me." After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, "Take this and divide it among you. For I tell you I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes. In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you. But the hand of him who is going to betray me is with mine on the table.

Tonight, at the Maundy Thursday service, I was struck by this last verse... this idea of betrayal.

I don't know if you've ever felt betrayed. This evening, as I was thinking about it, I could come up with three major times in my x number of years, when I have felt betrayed, turned against by someone close enough to me for it to hurt. And it hurt deeply. I felt wounded for months. Years even. I found it hard to trust the individuals who betrayed me. Hard to even be in the same room, without anger and rage. And, what's worse, their actions made it hard for me to trust others, who were, for all accounts, innocent, except for similar identification factors such as gender, age, position of authority, or proximity of intimacy.

And yet, in these four verses, we see Jesus, sitting at the same table with his betrayers. I use the plural here intentionally. It's not just Judas; the rest run out on him too. He sits at the table with his betrayers. And, tonight, I was picturing the conversation:

"Hey, Judas, would you pass the bread this way?" (The loaf I will use to represent my body, broken for you, which, as a result of your betrayal, will be nailed to the cross).

"Nice robe, Peter." (Do you realize that you'll shed it in a few hours, running away from me?)

"Hey, John, looking a little bit peeked tonight! Trek into town today did you in, huh?" (Don't you know that I need you to intercede with me tonight? Don't you know that I will be at my loneliest, and you will fall asleep on me!?)

These would be my comments. Trite. Biting. Painful. Intended to point out their upcoming betrayal before it could happen. But these are not Jesus' comments... Instead, he says:

This is my body given for you... [you is plural here, it is not exclusive to the "good ones"]
This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you. [I do this willingly]

It is striking to me that Jesus sits with his betrayers, and does not accuse. He does not give them the silent treatment. But he proffers himself to those, who only hours later, will betray him.

And I am tempted to think that I am different or unique, but the truth of the matter is, in the same way that he offered himself to his betrayers centuries ago, he also offers himself to me, who also betrays him daily. He offers freely. He offers willingly. He offers without reservation. And he offers regardless of the fact that I will betray him. His death, his sacrifice, for my betrayal.

Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.

* Maundy, for those curious, comes from the Latin, Mandatum, meaning "commandment" referring to Jesus' last commandment before he died. We celebrate the last supper on Maundy Thursday, as a way of remembering what Jesus did, remembering the cost, remembering our own brokenness and sin, remembering Jesus' promise of the new covenant in his blood, to be fulfilled only days later.

Melting...

[Marblehead Harbor, MA]

At long last, Spring appears to be coming to the Land-of-Cold-and-Frozen! :-)
[you can't tell from the picture, but it was a balmy 58 degrees!]