time to stop being a hummingbird

Did you know that, according to wikipedia, hummingbirds are the smallest of all birds, yet they can fly at speeds exceeding 15 meters/sec, they can hover motionless in the air, they can flap their wings 12-90 times per second, and they are the only bird that can fly backwards? They are called hummingbirds because of the "hum" their wings make as they flap so rapidly.

Why this needless information, you might ask?

I was thinking about hummingbirds this morning... and all the needless energy they exert, just to remain in the same place. Think about it. They flap their wings at 12-90 times per second, so that they can hover in the air, in exactly the same place. Not going anywhere. Just hovering. Of course, they can also fly super fast backwards and forwards (who wouldn't want to be able to do that), but they're most known for their ability to hover. Seems silly, really. All that energy expended, just to say in the same place.

Yet, how many of us do exactly the same thing?

We are constantly striving, running around, doing, just so that we can keep ourselves afloat. Just so that we can keep ourselves busy enough doing, so that we don't have to stop and face ourselves, as we truly are. We are terrified of what we will find, if we ever slow down.

So we flutter and flap, doing all sorts of good (and bad) things, in order to avoid silence, solitude, or facing ourselves. We attend meetings, we are part of committees, we save children, animals and the environment, we plan events, we work extra hours, we work too little, we play meaningless games, we tune out, we smoke up, we are constantly improving something or someone, we read self-help books, we avoid anything that makes us think, we plug in our ipods, we vent it out to our peers, we drink too much, we party too little, we proclaim everything permissible, we create restrictive moral codes, we surround ourselves with people, we avoid our friends, we fix others to avoid ourselves, we serve, we blog about it, we... the list could go on.

Guilty as charged.

All this fluttering, just to stay afloat.

Guilty as charged.

But I think the invitation that I've been realizing this past week is that just staying afloat is not what I hunger for. Being what I do, is not being who I am. Avoiding facing who I am is not a viable alternative. And I think there is an invitation, for both you and me, to something greater.

But that requires that we stop fluttering around like little bee-sized birds. It requires that we face who we are, in it's brokenness and beauty, and allow Jesus to rename, renew, redeem.

I want to be who I was created to be, not defined by what I do. Not kept afloat by meaningless efforts. But that requires that I honestly stop and face who I am in all of my brokenness and beauty, and invite Jesus to be the one who speaks identity.

It's time to stop being a hummingbird.